I had everything I'd hoped for, but I wasn't being myself. So I decided to be honest about who I was. It was strange: The people who loved me for being funny suddenly didn't like me for being... me.
Trust is hard to come by. That's why my circle is small and tight. I'm kind of funny about making new friends.
Always remember that you are absolutely unique. Just like everyone else.
I believe that if life gives you lemons, you should make lemonade... And try to find somebody whose life has given them vodka, and have a party.
No man has a good enough memory to be a successful liar.
Do not take life too seriously. You will never get out of it alive.
If you could kick the person in the pants responsible for most of your trouble, you wouldn't sit for a month.
I am blessed with a funny gene that makes me enjoy life.
To succeed in life, you need three things: a wishbone, a backbone and a funny bone.
Be stupid, be dumb, be funny, if that's who you are. Don't try to be someone that society wants you to be; that's stupid. So be yourself.
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