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Funny Quotes - Page 4
We are all born mad. Some remain so.
I know my strong points: I work hard, I have talent, I'm funny, and I'm a good person.
There cannot be a crisis next week. My schedule is already full.
I'm sorry, if you were right, I'd agree with you.
Lead us not into temptation. Just tell us where it is; we'll find it.
I love deadlines. I like the whooshing sound they make as they fly by.
I refuse to join any club that would have me as a member.
I am a candid interview and I have a dark and dry sense of humor - a very Canadian sense of humor and I am only learning now stupidly that you can't read tongue. When I say something funny in a newspaper and I meant it to be funny, it doesn't read that way.
There is a saying that if you get something for free, you should know that you're the product. It was never more true than in the case of Facebook and Gmail and YouTube. You get free social-media services, and you get free funny cat videos. In exchange, you give up the most valuable asset you have, which is your personal data.
Yuval Noah Harari
I like having a beard. What's funny is when you shave a beard, you realize how freezing cold your face is! The primary purpose evolution-wise is to keep you warm, to grow hair on your face. You shave it off, and your face is freezing for a few days.
I want my children to have all the things I couldn't afford. Then I want to move in with them.
I am not a member of any organized political party. I am a Democrat.
A word to the wise is infuriating.
Hunter S. Thompson
It's funny, because there are so many stereotypes out there about actors and movie stars in general, but I've had a great opportunity to meet a lot of them, and maybe it's just because they don't behave that way around me, but I rarely see that kind of abuse of power.
I've been fascinated by the Internet from the very start. In 2001, I had made a funny black-and-white film called 'How to Dance Properly,' a short video of me dancing to a Madonna song. I sent it to 17 of my friends on a Thursday, and by Monday, one million people a day were logging on to view it.
Of the Queen tributes, some of them are very funny, and some of them are really not funny at all. The terrible ones are cheesy and pantolike, more about dressing up in a Brian May wig and a Freddie Mercury moustache, and what they're missing out is the fact that the music is quite complicated and actually not easy to perform.
You know, you can touch a stick of dynamite, but if you touch a venomous snake it'll turn around and bite you and kill you so fast it's not even funny.
It's a funny feeling to work with people who you consider your colleagues and to realize that they actually are young enough to be your children.
My ideal prom date would have to be cute, funny, sweet, nice.
I call myself the Amusement Park. That's because I'm funny and scary at the same time.
I have an unfortunate personality.
I can't stress to you enough how much I can relate to teens being cyberbullied. Something that helps me is looking at old videos of me and my friends from middle school, or videos of my family. I love watching funny videos of my favorite people - it really cheers me up.
Every photograph is the photographer's opinion about something. It's how they feel about something: what they think is horrible, tragic, funny.
Mary Ellen Mark
You know, fame is a funny thing, man, especially, you know, actors, musicians, rappers, rock singers, it's kind of a lifestyle and it's easy to get caught up in it - you go to bars, you go to clubs, everyone's doing a certain thing... It's tough.
Comedy is a tool of togetherness. It's a way of putting your arm around someone, pointing at something, and saying, 'Isn't it funny that we do that?' It's a way of reaching out.
If two wrongs don't make a right, try three.
Laurence J. Peter
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